I watched this movie last Friday night. It was called “Berbagi Suami”, which means Sharing Husband. The story was narrated by three women, who actually are not connected with each others. They have one thing in common though, they have to share their husband with other woman. They are somehow trapped in polygamy. The movie was interesting because the theme is actually very close to our society, yet not a cliché, as we usually avoid discussing this sensitive topic. Why this is sensitive is because most people relate this problem with Islam, which explicitly excuses (not allows I would rather say!) polygamy. But Nia Dinata, the director, in my opinion has successfully presented it free from prejudice of any religion. She somehow managed to prove that this is all about selfishness and hypocrisy, rather than an issue of any religion. She pictured it (successfully) how inconvenient it is to have that kind of family, for both side: the man, let alone the woman. Although it was a comedy in genre (and we were laughing as a matter of fact), the message was clear that it was about tragedies.
The first woman is a doctor, who is smart, religious and has independent career, married to a successful, who symbolically looks religious, businessman. They have this looks like a perfect marriage, with an adorable son, who would then turn into a smart but cynical young guy. He loves his mother, but would always criticize her for being too submissive, and silent despite having discovered the not-so-favorable hobby of the husband, who ironically always behaves faultlessly at home. The mother defends herself that she simply follows what’s according to the religion, and that she does it for love. Meanwhile, she cries in silence and eventually becomes immune of heart-break pain. In the end, the husband, dying of heart attack, wishes to come and be treated at her home. For a moment she felt as if she is the winner. But having him home this time means she has to face the reality openly that she’s sharing the husband with other women (yes, the husband has more than two wives in fact). She swallows her pain, and presents herself always as a devoted wife, until the husband died peacefully after delivering one important message to his son, that he regretted the way he has chosen. The fun doesn’t worth the headache, he said. But in the funeral, when everybody was just about to leave, comes a teenager girl with a baby, crying and calling the husband. While we were all laughing, most of us were probably asking: can we really trust man’s words?
The second case was even weirder. An already too crowded family with two wives under the same roof, was expecting another one, because they are too busy with the kids, and the husband is “thirsty” again. Here, religion was never discussed, and love was something absurd. They all take the situation for granted, and enjoy what’s only left, the pleasure from sex (which belongs exclusively to the husband and the less-sensitive first wife) and the companionship among the wives (so much for a sweet lemon). The second and third wives run away together after they realize that they love each other more than they love the husband.
In the third story I was expecting that the woman will get the advantage this time. A very lovely young girl was asked to marry her boss. The guy (according to him) cannot leave his wife no matter how much he (according to him) loves the girl, and no matter how unhappy he was (according to him also) with his wife. Since they are Catholics, the guy has to forge a new ID with single status in order to marry her. He gives her a condominium, and treats her perfectly whenever they are together. Having all what she needs to call for a convenient life seems just perfect for her. She soon realizes that she really loves him, and would actually be happy without all the facilities anyway. But it turns out it’s only for a short period of time. When the first wife finds out, she kicks her (literally) out of her apartment provided by the husband. The husband came to see her the following day, only to say goodbye, with convincing tears and a bulky envelope of money. The family is leaving for the US! Although I thought that the guy truly loves her, still it’s a nonsense. Once again the woman suffers most.
In the above stories the victims were mostly the women, but the most victim of all is actually love, people abuse it! They justify stupid things, hurting themselves and others in the name of love. On the other hand, people refuse to settle with love because of things they consider more important, yet they can’t just leave it alone.
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